Tis the season to be careful

Your Government is working hard for you at Xmas. Proof is in the pudding or in this case, the leaflet produced - Advent calendar style - by Ed Ball's Department for Children, Schools and Families called "Tis the Season to be Careful". More than 150,000 leaflets have been distributed through shopping centres, children's centres, housing associations and local fire and rescue services over the Christmas period. If people weren't worried enough by the economic downturn, they should also beware of the perils lurking in every household during the festive season.

Measures must be taken to avoid the following accidents:

• Parents stabbing themselves with scissors they have grabbed instead of screwdrivers to assemble toys;
• People cutting themselves with knives they are using to open presents too quickly;
• Children falling off rocking horses (?) or smashing new bikes into walls;
• Tipsy party guests toppling down stairs or crashing to the floor when they miss their seat at the dinner table; and
• In the kitchen where most people love to gather during Christmas, gravy exploding in microwave ovens, burns and scolds from cooking the turkey and cuts from chopping vegetables.

We have also been advised to make sure that presents are suitable for a child’s age, avoid hanging decorations from lights and heaters as they can burn easily, keep batteries away from babies and toddlers as they can choke on small things and empty out glasses as small amounts of alcohol can poison young children.

I haven't received a leaflet, so I enter Christmas having to rely on my own judgement around my own home. So far so good. No accidents to report. Though I did feel like reporting using taxpayers' money to produce glossy leaflets that simply to state the obvious.